Rolling with the Punches

I wonder if there's a form of martial arts that can be converted into diaper changing defense. I'm thinking the Karate Kid crane technique combined with Tibetan monk meditation. For the first few months, any rookie can change a diaper. Fast, slow - it doesn't really matter. The baby basically just stays where you plop her.  One thing I've learned as a new mom, however, is that the art of diaper duty is constantly changing. Just when you think you're about to break your record, she discovers rolling.

Watching a baby learn and explore is amazing. When she starts rolling from point A to point how-the-heck-did-you-get-over-there, it quickly evolves into a new lifestyle for you both. Now that she's becoming mobile and learning how to move independently, those skills don't stop at the floor.

What was once a pesky interruption transforms into a game of one-on-one. It's bad enough when your little wiggler twists and turns all over the changing table as you play whack-a-mole with the baby wipe. It's another thing entirely when all you have is the floor and some good intentions.

No rails quickly translates into free reign for your twisty little mover. Your ankle hold suddenly lacks conviction. Oh, sure; it's funny until she flips onto her belly and makes a break for it - before the new diaper is in place. Now you're dealing with: 1) catching a crafty little scooter before she finds a dead bug; and 2) thwarting your escapee before she sprinkles the floor in her birthday suit.

My advice: get fast - quick. Use a toy or a clean diaper to distract her (don't get too comfortable - you may need to switch out a different object several times a day). Play with her so that you become more interesting than the box of wipes behind her head (and don't feel bad when you're not more interesting than the box). Blowing on her tummy and singing songs can go a long way to keeping her belly up. And for those messier diapers... well, hold your breath and pray.