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Thursday, January 8, 2015

Potty Training: To Pee or Not to Pee?

Potty training. Depending where you are in your phase of parenthood, you either read those two little words and: a) wistfully smiled in your naivety; b) shuddered; or c) sighed in remembered relief that those days are now behind you.


If you answered A, I feel your current struggle. You’re worried the cost of diapers will put you in the poor house. Well, you’re in luck; those monetarily-challenged residents probably don’t want your bare-bottomed babe snuggling up to them – not while she’s as likely to inflict a deluge of poop as the peskiest of pigeons. Right, then. Now you’re worried the cost, and subsequent lack, of diapers will move you to the outhouse. Super.

If you answered B, I empathize with your struggle. You’ve dived into the world of teaching a tiny person how to pee into a large pot. Not only that, but you’ve also resigned yourself to sidling up beside said tot on an uncomfortable bathtub or a too-small step stool. You’ve accepted the fact that sometimes you’ll need to read five stories before she will rid herself of the poop that just last week took seconds to push into a diaper. Oh, and don’t forget the never-ending supply of candy it takes to positively reinforce the idea that using the potty is amazing. (By the way, I feel it necessary to mention that my own 2 year old matter-of-factly told me that grown-ups don’t get candy for going on the potty. That’s just what we do.)

If you answered C, I applaud you for making it to the other side. I also smile in my own wistful naivety at the idea that it will get easier by the time I stand where you are. (I’ll continue when you’re finished laughing.)

While potty training is certainly not without its challenges (keep the Lysol handy for those living room floor accidents), it can also be pretty great in the end. Yes, saving money on diapers is awesome, but it’s more than that. It’s the first time that tiny person tugs at your arm and says, “Mommy, I gotta go potty!” (Which is also the time when you realize what a fast sprinter you are.) It’s the way she beams at having done it all by herself. It’s the truly special sense of pride you feel knowing that your child is becoming an independent person, capable of anything.

Ok, so maybe potty training isn’t so bad, after all.

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

The Monster and the Mom (Short Story)

As parents, there are definitely days when sleep deprivation gets the better of us. You know what I'm talking about - we're grumpy, our energy levels dip into the negatives, and even the hard floor looks so inviting. You just want to curl up in a ball and drift off into a wonderfully hazy cloud of sweet, sweet sleep. But instead, you get sticky fingers shoved up your nose and drool oozing down the back of your neck. Ah, the joys of parenthood.

So in the spirit of laughing at ourselves, I hope you'll take a few minutes to enjoy this quick read. The short story in its entirety can be found at Tampa Bay Moms Blog.

"She heard the sound instantly; the baby was up. The siren-like screech darted across the house and echoed through the monitor. Her feet hit the floor, but she didn't feel the worn carpet between her toes. Her eyes were open (barely), but she didn't see the hallway. She could make the trek from her bed to the nursery in her sleep because, well, she did. Every night. Hovering over the crib, she patted the mattress for the lost treasure. She found the pacifier and effortlessly plugged the source of her wakefulness. Too late. He was up and he was hungry..." (Read more)